26April 2011

(Memory of u & me)

when end work saw ur fb post n ah yi post on my wall de thing i dunno why i feel like crying my heart feel heavy. I would't tell de others how i feel even i wanna tell ppl how sad i'm now my mouth will stop me from saying, none of a word will come out of my mouth.. I dun wish to create more yao yan, i noe when i hav't break wif him i'm always close wif u bt now it's diff i just break n i dun wan them to say i break coz of u or watever, u can say i dumb so why must i care so much about wat they say, i just dun like de feeling.. u are not me how will u noe how much i feel right now? Even somtime i wish that u will surprise me by waiting at de staircase or my hus downstair n wait for me to go work, but i noe i'm just dreaming.. I'll went over to ur hus sometime to surprise u coz i wanna c u, my feet just wanna go ur hus n find u but i dunno why.. Thanks for letting me know that u have aldy stop loving me n going to give up.. How much u mean to me i'll just keep to myself u are forever my friend.. How gd u treat me will always keep inside my heart, hope u find a better girl who would't make u angry like i do.. I always di siao u or di siao ppl i dunno why i like to di siao ppl maybe it will make me laugh n happy for a time being so that i would't emo maybe this kind of method to di stress is not right n i should't di siao u.. I guess u will be happy few days later coz u no ned to take care a little, dumb, stupid n silly girl sorry to say that coz i'm just speaking the true.. U not ned to gt emo coz of me, i'll visit de hamster when i'm free, the pic really v cute.. I will have to grow strong 1 day so i'll go to the changi village myself, even if there's anything happen wif me also not anyone business it's my own business.. wo hai xiang ku, wo yao bian jian qiang, wo bu yao kao nan ren wo bu shi yi ge weak girl!! wo bu xiang yao jie ni de jian ban ku qi!! ni bu zhi dao wo de xin yao dou tong he nan shuo... good bye.. I dun think you will see this post since u say buy to me.. Maybe i should't post on the blog again rite, de way i msg u can't see my emotion i put hahas doesn't mean i'm happy if u emo n u dun wish to let de other ppl noe u will always put this to let ppl noe that u are fine..

17 April 2011

Quarrel wif him on de phone, i did't mean to hurt him so much butyhis is de only way i can do to free myself.. Am i making de right decision? I really dun wish to gt into a relationship soon, i feel so tire de only thing i wanna do now is find a full time job quit sch n take private.. This is wat i wan now, Wish me good luck ba.. Slp whole day again guess i'm really v tire ba, just cut abit of my hair.. i need to straighten my fringe le... Plan to go for another Genting trip on Sept or Oct, must c wee tiong can take leave anot hahas.. Need to save money for many thing le... Jia you ba..

15 April 2011

Saying break up wif him, chat for so long make me piss of n going crazy soon.. WTH.. I dun wanna bother anymore... FUCKING TIRE HATE U...

Feel like crying...

11 April 2011

Dunno why i feel like asking u to send me to sch, but thanks anyway to accompany me to the MRT... I know u wouldn't be like last time le, i should change my bad habit n alot of thing i need to do.. If i ask u can i hug u again will u let me hug or reject me? Maybe i know the ans very well.. Guess u wouldn't c my blog again so no matter what i say is useless just talking to myself.. What my heart is thinking? either break n become single forever.. Make my decision to take private course, but the 1st thing to do now is to save money n find a full time job as for k box i temporary work as a part- time.. Did u really understand me well? will u know what I'm thinking now n do u know my feeling? U dunno how i feel how i wish i can dun bother about anything but all those stupid r/s thing n other thing keep coming to my door step n knock my door looking for me.. U dunno how badly i need a shoulder now, not everything i'll say out or talk to some1 I'm also a shy person, u dunno i need a lot of courage to say sth to ppl, sth that is difficult for girls to say.. U will never know it.. U wouldn't know how much i wish to hug u just now but the things that u said to me i know u have aldy change , it's gd that u have change to become stronger.. And i know i should do sth to slove my problem myself.. Love really hurt, n de true is more hurt than love n de reason i cry is becoz i noe a hurtful true... How i wish i dunno de true about him n that person so i would't feel so bad, is he taking revenge? Being close to a person mean flirt? Playing wif guy is flirt? U keep saying u trust me, but u didn't trust Jonathan that's why u dun let me go out with him? WTH u aldy told me de ans by saying that, u didn't trust me at all u dun trust.. Stop lying to yourself..

9April 2011

Morning after work jonathan accompany me wait for aveline as it's wee tiong POP.. I meet her at cityhall mrt mac, me n jonathan went to marina square outside john little slack n chat around.. when aveline reach cityhall we than walk over to find her, chat alot of thing wif jonathan maybe i should think wat i wanna do now n not just hack care, there's sth we n hack care but not this relationship this.. Do i have a little feeling for u? Sign!! today otw back from garden there had a small quarrel wif him on de hp.. supper piss off.. Hais what my heart is thinking? jonathan n da tou dun really wish me to accompany aveline go wee tiong POP as i'll gt left out, as it's her bf for wat i go? Luckily jonathan accompany me go after i keep pleasing him haha.. Did't go work n attand de Sch committee thing, supper tire aft all de thing went home slp till nite than meet aveline, her bf n da tou for a dinner haha...

7April 2011

Today working at Zone 1 saw 2 new full time server haha.. gt 1 guy look abit like xiao tou, n tat uniform tat he wear is dam nice than us, it's a black polo tee.. Work till 10 i going recept work till close not much customer today, but i dun like Mr jimmy friend those ppl at rm806 wam.. They always call jimmy here there for discount or Mr jimmy will give her friend FOC, let them smock inside or give special discount to them let them have de VIP Rm.. Today at briefing i was late n i dun like de thing tat he say in de briefing, was hard to work n i really feel v sian working at there.. Plus can say dunno is cold war wif him again or quarrel.. Sian ar.. I just wanna be alone awhile to cool down can't i? i just wann cry out can't i? Fine i dun wish to say anything le it's all my fault tat's it.., Ppl smoke, cut their wrist, take drugs drink alcholic to disstress but it's not use, i just now really feel like Buying cig or liqiour to disstress... I'm really tire if i really break i would't tep into relationship again it's so painful...

3April 2011

Went to sembawang Park wif J, from Yishun walk to sembawang Park hahas de distance is supper far... Watch movie wif him at yishun GV Sucker Punch.. Went to HG slack at a void deck at hou gang Green gt a group of ppl went to sit infront of us n chat loudly, they were like xiao lian v noisy n keep saying alot of vulgar... Dam it i feel so irritating..